Interwebs Etiquette

The worst part about being an anonymous, unaccountable, opinionated, immature interwebs diver is having to hang out with a bunch of anonymous, unaccountable, opinionated, immature interwebs divers.

Let's face it, this formula, taken from tvtropes, pretty much sums up the interwebs community sometimes:

Average Person + Anonymity + Audience = Absolutely Horrible Manners. But it doesn't have to be all bad. I now proudly present, in an attempt to rectify this situation, the interwebsjunkie's guide to interwebs etiquette!

Rule 1 - Don't Feed the Trolls

I won't be the first to say this, and I won't be the last. Trolls (so called because they, like fishermen, troll for bites (angry responses) in the sea of the interwebs (also retconned to mean they are nasty, like trolls)) exist only to verify their existence by goading others into flaming at them.

These angry reactions are their sustenance, their mission, their very reason for existing. Deny them this, and they shrivel and die. Feed them, and they thrive. And trolls can breed. A troll can smell the scent of an easy target, and they'll home in on forums where they are likely to be noticed and vindicated.

So the next time you see "ur mom is fat" just ignore them. They'll go away eventually. Nothing is worse to a troll then to be ignored, and nothing is more annoying than to see some noob getting angry at an obvious troll and engulfing an entire thread in painful flaming.

Rule 2 - Think Before you Flame

We've all seen this. Someone makes a comment about another poster, who then flies off the handle and begins spouting flame like an outraged interwebs dragon.

The medium of electronic communication is a vague one. There is no body language, no facial expressions (other than smileys) or any nonverbal cues at all to let someone know you are kidding. When something could be an insult against you, assume it isn't.

Violations of this rule often lead to the embarrassing double irony, where someone gets mad, the other person says they were just kidding, and then the original offender must claim they were also just kidding, ironically getting mad. There is no limit to how deep this can go, either. I've witnessed a poster claim to be kidding about getting mad at the other person getting mad at them getting mad. It was just silly.

Rule 3 - Don't Bite the Hand that Hosts You

Some people take the time to host websites where people can chat, visit forums and create a community. They are the builders of the town halls of the interwebs, and deserve our thanks and praise. They, or those they put in their place, act as admins to forums, policing and enforcing the rules they have seen fit to erect on their site.

Sometimes these rules are strange, but more often they are pretty basic: no forum necromancy,
no marketing products, no racial-based flaming, stuff like that. However, there is always a few ne'er do wells (possibly trolls, but often as not deluded divers) who decide that this is an affront to their rights as Americans, and that the admin is infringing on their right to free speech.

They claim they should be able to say whatever they like without censorship. Usually, I agree, but this is the interwebs equivalent of barging into someones house, loudly yelling profanities and then getting outraged when they ask you to stop.

Rule 4 - Help the Noobs

Yes, they are annoying. No, they don't understand what you mean when you talk in your favorite forum slang. But you were once a noob too. Hopefully, they'll follow my Rule 5 (see below) but even if they don't, you shouldn't pwn them, even if they deserve it.

Someday, they could be members of the forum and contribute just as much as you have. Perhaps they could be your friend at that time, and have interesting conversations. But none of this will happen if you ignore, belittle or curse at them. They'll likely slink away, shamed of their status, and you'll have disobeyed interwebs etiquette.

Rule 5 - Do Some Lurking Before you Post

Okay, so you found this cool new site. You want to dive right into the conversation, but what's this? You don't know what a PetSol is, or why anyone would want to CurioCamp?

Basically, you have two options; either do the responsible thing, lurk a bit, try to find out from context clues and look around for the FAQ thread or any stickies that explain terminology (there almost always is one) or you could be the annoying noob you are and start a new thread (probably in an inappropriate forum) titled HEY WHAT DOES THIS MEAN LOL and annoy all of the other posters.

Why is this relatively minor infraction annoying? Because your post is right above another post asking the same thing. And below it. Any forum is going to be spammed by noobs asking these questions, and even the most civic minded interwebs diver is going to be slowly worn down by the torrent of noobs.

Five easy rules to make yourself a more polite interwebs user. Of course, always remember that on the other end of that annoying poster is a real person, with thoughts, feelings and emotions. No matter how much fun it would be to anonymously crush them, it wouldn't be polite.

DIVING DEEPER -

http://www.livinginternet.com/i/ia_nq.htm - A great article on more netiquette.